Leibster Award

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A big thank you to Bel over at Life @ No. 2 for my nomination for a Liebster Award. ‘What is a Liebster Award?’ I hear you ask. Well it’s simple. It’s an award for the little guys in the blogging pool. Those that have under 200 followers on their blog or likers on their Facebook page. It’s a way to reward and support those who are starting out. It has a quirky connection to the number 11 whereby you have to answer 11 questions from your nomination, tell 11 facts about yourself, select 11 blogs to nominate, and ask those bloggers 11 questions. Still a little hazy on the details, or I’ve nominated you below and you want to know what you have to do, go to this blog by Runnin Off At The Mouth for a more detailed overview.

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My questions from the talented Bel:

1. What is on your bedside table? A picture says a thousand words.

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2. What are you reading at the moment? The memory keepers daughter by Kim Edwards, Save Our Sleep by Tizzie Hall (the stuff on introducing solids) and next in line The Complete Works of Jane Austen. That is of course when I have time to read which is, uh, never.

3. What is your first childhood memory? I’m not exactly sure how old I am but considering its at our first house I would be 3 or under. I am standing in the corner of the fence, leaning over and dangling my mum’s life sized pink panther over the fence, snatching it away when the dog behind us tries to grab it. Not sure how it ended but remember pink panther being around for many more years so can’t have been too bad.

4. Where is your favourite place to escape to?. The country. Doesn’t matter where. I just need tress, green grass, meadows, horses, cows, fresh air, rolling hills. Peace. We will one day get our country property and I know that’s when I will truly feel home.

5. Chocolate pudding or sticky date?. Chocolate, no contest. It’s not desert unless chocolate is involved!!

6. If you had to chose your favourite meal, what would it be and who would cook it?. Oh so hard, so very very hard. Um my hubby’s lasagne, cooked by him of course. It’s delicious and it also means I didn’t have to cook. Although pretty much anything I don’t have to cook tastes amazing lol

7. It’s Friday night what are you doing?. Waiting for the kids to all be asleep so I can go to bed too. So sad I know.

8. Did you attend University? Yep. Went to Melbourne Uni and got my Bachelor of Education (Primary). Also currently on intermission but studying a postgraduate degree at Monash Uni in Psychology. One subject to go and I have another qualification.

9. Do you believe in woo woo? (Spirits, Crystals, Tarot, etc). Very much so. I have had many things predicted accurately by two different psychics (both work at the same place in Bacchus Marsh funnily enough). Things like my Dad’s stroke, having twins (including the female being eldest even though doctors continually said Declan would be born first due to his position), and my Poppy’s health problems.

10. What is your staple piece of clothing? PJ’s bahahaha. Um in all seriousness a pair of dark jeans or a plain long sleeved top. Can wear anything with them, dress them up or down with accessories.

11. Do you believe in karma?YES. I try to treat others the way I would want to be treated and instead of trying to get ‘revenge’ on someone believe karma will come back to nite them on the ass one day. I also try to help anyone and everyone I can.

11 Random Facts About Myself:

1. I have a very varied taste in music. I don’t like just one style and you can find on my play list on any given day rap, rock, pop, classical, instrumental and r’n’b. And that’s just today.

2. If I could be any character from a book it would definitely be Elizabeth Bennett from Pride and Prejudice. I really admire her strength, spirit and courage. Plus I am in love with Mr Darcy!

3. I feel awkward in most social circumstances and constantly worry what other people think about me.

4. I have a lot of acquaintances but only a few real friends. These people I would do anything for because I know they feel the same about me. These are the people who know the real me and accept me.

5. I know I am annoying. I talk too much and can be loud. These are actually bad traits formed to cover up the fact of how nervous and uncertain I feel around people.

6. I love reading and would rather do this than watch TV or anything else. I can tune out pretty much anything when I read and become one with the story.

7. I once met Robert Jordan (my favourite author) and it was one of the most amazing experiences ever.

8. I am not a big fan of fruit. I eat apples, pears, watermelon, bananas, and cantaloupe. That’s about it.

9. I HATE cooking. With a passion. My version of cooking involves a lot of packets and jars. Quick and easy. Any recipe that has more than 5 steps or even sounds complicated I don’t even try. I will wash 1000 dishes to get out of cooking.

10. I am a perfectionist. People who know what my home and work spaces look like don’t believe this but it’s true. I am so focused on having things perfect there are times I don’t even start. (E.g. Clothes are hung by type – shirts, sub-type – sleeve length, then colour). It’s exhausting and I am trying hard to over come this. My mantra ‘It doesn’t have to be perfect it just has to be done’.

11. I knew my hubby over 5 years before we started dating and he dated a couple of my friends beforehand (years before we got together though). AND the first night we finally got together we were at The Peel in Richmond for a friends birthday.

The blogs I am nominating for this award (some of whom I know have been nominated previously but trying to get as close to my 11 as possible):

Saradipity -Sarah is new to the blogging world, has a little boy and many stories to tell. She is also the sister of one of my closest friends.

Wild Child On Board – Kathryn and I met years ago when I was working with her best friend at KMart. She is also my very talented hairdresser (ie first person other than my sister to do my hair and have me love it). She has a beautiful daughter and a little boy on the way.

No Frills Mum – Dre and I used to teach together and she has written blogs for very reasons. This is the blog where she shares her motherhood journey and life.

Positivelysarcastic – The title of this blog had me intrigued from the start. I am a very sarcastic person, I think it’s a great medium for humour. She is also a mum of twins, although older than mine, and has twin skin that she likes to call Tonya.

Renovation: Rosedale – After watching Renovation Rescue and The Block my love of renovating resurfaced (it disappeared while doing it myself lol) and so I trawled bloglovin’ for some blogs to inspire me for one day down the track. Ellie and her husband have just bought a house in Austin, Texas. I loved her design inspiration, it’s exactly what I would do if I was fully renovating a house.

Bear Creek Honey – Elizabeth is also a mummy to boy / girl twins and they are only 7 months old. I love read her blog to get an idea of what’s coming up next for me. She is also a big one for musings and talking about life.

Michimama – A new blogger and mum to a young child. She has a great philosophy on life and shares some great parenting related links.

Ladies your 11 questions are:

1. Where is your ultimate holiday destination?

2. If you could have one wish come true what would it be?

3. What are you scared of?

4. Toilet paper roll – over or under?

5. Where did you meet your partner and how old were you when you first started dating?

6. What is your favourite kids show?

7. Who is your hero and why?

8. If you could meet anyone, living or dead, who would it be?

9. Look left, what do you see?

10. Do you have a five or ten year plan?

11. Who is your celebrity crush?

The Positivity Files Are Dead

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I’ve been thinking for a while about my 50th post and what it should be about. It just seems like such a milestone and something to be proud of. And I am proud, so very proud of myself, for getting to the big 5-0. So I decided that this post should be about me. Not me the mother, me the wife, me the teacher, me the whatever else. Just me, stripped bear, the real me.

I came to this decision after having a revelation. A revelation about The Positivity Files. I was finding them so hard to write, to keep track of things, to make time for writing them. It’s not that I don’t feel positive or have really great things happen, big and small, every day, because I do. So why was I having so much trouble? Why couldn’t I write these posts? Why was I avoiding them?

It took a while but I think I have figured it out. It’s a little complicated cause that’s how I roll. At the start of the year in this post here I set myself a word for the year, instead of a New Years Resolution. That word was positivity. I chose that word because I felt like I was being very negative at the time. However on looking back I am unsure if it was me thinking I was too negative or if it was people around me telling me I was being too negative. And that’s where my problem begins.

I think it’s ok to share negative thoughts and experiences. I think it’s ok to recognise negative things are happening and express that. I think it’s ok to feel negative when things aren’t going your way. It’s not that I don’t recognise or enjoy the positive things, I do, but I also know that there are crap things that happen. I truly believe that to enjoy and experience the positive you have to allow yourself to experience the negative. Without sadness there is no happiness.

Then there is the fact that since setting myself that word I truly believe the universe has been testing me. Trying to see how committed I am to this word. There are some things that have happened this year that have been truly shit. At one stage I felt like a whole heap of shit was being shovelled on top of me and burying me underneath it. I also felt like I wasn’t allowed to say this because, after all, I’m too negative. That was a bad decision and actually lead me to experiencing more negativity, in the form of guilt and pain. Not only was I going through a crap time I was making myself wrong for feeling like it was crap. Dear Universe, my commitment is wafer thin, perhaps non-existent. Thank you for showing me this.

Now don’t get me wrong, there are some people out there who can turn every negative into a positive, who can see the bright side of things, and who truly believe just by thinking positive things will be so. I am envious of them but I have also realised that is not me. By trying to force myself into being someone I am not, by making myself wrong whenever I did feel or think negatively, I was making myself feel worse.

So the dilemma. I could continue the positivity files and create another set of negativity files, but that didn’t feel right either. I could just keep trying with the positivity files but in all honesty I think they are boring and too airy fairy for me. It isn’t something I would personally chose to read so why would I continue writing them? I don’t want to seek out the positive or negative, I just want to experience life, in all it’s forms and with whatever it sends my way. I don’t want to feel wrong for experiencing it my way, or for sharing how I feel.

I have made a promise to myself. I am just going to be me. If I am unhappy with something about myself I will ask myself why. Is it because I feel that way, I think I should feel that way, or others are making me feel that way? Only the first answer is good enough for me to make changes. Otherwise those changes are just going to make me feel worse. I am me and I like who I am. I don’t want to be what everyone else (or anyone else) wants me to be. Well enough so that I am going to work on making sure I am acting and being a way that is what I think is right, that feels right for me.

Have you had any big revelations lately? Do you act in certain ways because you feel it is expected of you but not who you are? Have you overcome this? If yes please share how 🙂

Giving Back

I have decided to start a new series on this blog. This series will be of no gain to myself and will not be sponsored. It’s all about me supporting others. I really liked the book Pay It Forward (never seen the movie but want to) and this is my way of following the concept. I love the idea of doing something to help someone for no other reason than I can.

This series will feature blog posts about small businesses, predominantly mumpreneurs (although no sexism here dadpreneurs welcome too) and small business owners who I believe offer high-quality goods and services. I am thinking it will run as an interview with a little bio and links to the businesses. I will also include photos, info and a review of whatever good/s and/or services I accessed.

I am not planning on this being a regular occurrence, like a monthly blog, but will just write a post when I feel I have something to share. I will not be asking (or accepting) ANYTHING from these businesses. However they will be businesses I have used myself previously. I will also not feature businesses that I have not used myself or that I am not 100% happy with. It’s just my way of sharing things that I have sourced for myself that I loved. If I love them maybe you would too, or that’s what my thinking is. Basically, just like in the real world, where I would tell my friends about great services and goods I had received, it’s me telling my online friends the same thing.

I already have a couple of businesses lined up or in mind. In the interests of being open and honest some are friends. Again, I would not recommend just because of this, I’m not into nepotism. Some are also complete strangers. Actually the first two I have in mind are people I do not personally know but were recommended to me through word of mouth.

I’m not exactly sure what to call this series, so any ideas are welcome. Maybe even just Paying It Forward – business name??

If you have a business, or would like to recommend a business you love, that could be included in this series, you can email me their details at: thebusymumma@gmail.com

I Have A Friend …

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OK so it’s fair to say I’m more than a little behind on my blog reading lately. I just don’t seem to find the time even though I really miss it and really want to find out what’s been happening out there in blogland. Today when I took a few minutes to start reading through my backlog of 100+ posts in my bloglovin’ feed I noticed a while back there was a theme, one that resonated with me, one that I also want to delve into. That theme was FRIENDSHIP.

I have a friend who ….

Is always there for me no matter what

Can never seem to find the time to catch up with me

Goes out of her way to make me feel loved

Accepts me for who I am and doesn’t try to change my crazy ways

Can disagree with me but not make me feel wrong

Supports me in all I do

Listens without judgement

Gets angry at people I am angry at and will tell me to ignore the bullies

Loves my children as if they were her own

Has a secret I can’t wait for her to share with the world so I can be as excited on the outside as I am on the inside

Takes everything I have to give but does not return the favour

Is happy for me to come to her but won’t come to me

I think doesn’t really like me at all

Is just as crazy as I am

Isn’t really a friend at all

Competes with everything I do and puts me down

Talks behind my back and bad mouths everything I do

Has held me as I cried in pain, tears rolling down my face and body heaving in agony

Has stuck up for me in front of complete strangers

I know loves me but doesn’t know how to show it

Only wants to tell me about her life and doesn’t care about mine

Constantly complains about her life but won’t do anything to change it

Is the most amazing person I have ever met and whom I owe so much

Is able to make me feel better when I am down, no matter what

Will always be there until the end

As I read through the above list, of qualities of friends past and present, I realise that quite a few of those qualities show that the women they describe aren’t really friends at all.

Over the years I seem to have less friends but the ones I have are true friends and reflect the qualities that are integral to maintaining a healthy relationship. These women who are a part of my life have helped shape me in ways I am sure they don’t even realise.

I know it’s not the done thing to tell your friends how much you care, and how much they mean to you, but it should be exactly what we do.

To all of my friends out there THANK YOU for the person you are, for the amazing woman and friend you are, for bringing out the me that I love and admire. Without you I would be lost. xoxo

Do you have friends who when you think about it don’t really deserve the title? Do you have amazing women in your life who help you be the best you you can be? Do you tell them how you feel about them?