The Positivity Files 4

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Artwork by Niamh

Sorry about the month-long wait on this one. It’s not that I didn’t have anything positive happen over the last month, I was just flat out living life with 3 beautiful terrors children. I also didn’t write down things throughout the weeks to make my life easy. This week back to jotting down positive happenings at the end of every night.

* Sleep, blessed, wonderful, amazing sleep. I didn’t realise how truly tired I was until I started getting more sleep. Harper and Declan are steaming towards a full nights sleep with the one overnight feed getting ever closer to a reasonable (for me) morning wake up.

* A change in routine. Because of the later night feeds the twins now wake up around 8, or I get them up. This means feeds are around 12, 4 and 8. This is perfect for us as Hubby, Niamh and I can eat dinner as soon as hubby gets home at 6:30 then move straight into the nighttime routine. Much better than trying to juggle dinner, hungry loud babies who need a bath / shower and a feed.

* Being able to get dinner on the table by 6:30 every night. Seriously I deserve an award for this! First of all I hate cooking, like really hate it. Secondly, the twins go through witching hour (or hours as the case may be) during this time. Getting a half decent meal on the table, that everyone will eat (fussy hubby more so than fussy Niamh) is a miracle!!!

* Our baby swings are the best thing ever. Witching hour is manageable now we have put them together and the correct batteries installed. While Declan is swung to peace, if not sleep, Harper can have a nap and I can get things (like the above mentioned dinner) done.

* Online shopping. This was a first for me. I have never, ever, ever bought clothes online. I am the sort of person who walks into a shop, tries on a million things, and then may walk out with something that looks half decent. Sometimes. This week I got brave and with the help of a measuring tape and a size guide ordered some clothes.

* Bravery. OK I know I’m blowing my own trumpet here but I feel like I was really brave and want to share. Some of the clothes I bought online were too big (another positive yay me) and I needed to return them. So when Niamh was at Kinder for her full day Friday I toddled off to the closest store and returned them. While there I partook in a little shopping, fed the twins (that was my biggest fear, how to feed them both while out) and had a spot of lunch. I felt like superwoman afterward and so, well, proud of myself.

* The resilience of children. This month we had a traumatic event occur when Niamh’s dog Paris, a tiny little teacup chihuahua, somehow got into the yard behind us and was killed by the big aggressive dogs that live there. Although all of this has been absolutely horrible, Niamh is slowly remembering the good things about Paris and forgetting the details of what happened. Resilience and a short memory span for the negatives are great things and I’m glad Niamh has both.

* Nutella pancakes. Do I need to elaborate? Did I mention they also had sliced banana. Going out for breakfast is just the best. When your bestie and her hubby comes too, divine.

* Having a girls day out. For Mothers Day hubby and my kidlets got me a reasonable chunk of voucher from my favourite fat ladies store. To spend said voucher I was also entitled to a day off. After above-mentioned heaven of a breakfast there was a massage at the local day spa and a butt load of shopping. I came away with some gorgeous clothes and a better self-esteem after finding some lovely things that made me feel great.

* Online sales, oh how I love thee. After becoming brave enough to shop online, and after I had a better idea of what size I was at my favourite stores (smaller than I thought and the guide told me yay) I had the confidence to buy some gorgeous clothes at quite reduced prices. My favourite piece by far is a tunic / dress in a rainbow print that is just divine. When I get the opportunity to wear it I promise to share.

* Doctors finally listening, or should that be doctors who know what they’re talking about. I finally saw a doctor who took my concerns seriously and she started the ball rolling with tests. After a couple of confusing face swelling incidents she sent me straight to a paediatrician. Turns out he is the best and she went above and beyond to get me in immediately. This means Declan and Harper’s cows milk allergies were diagnosed before Declan’s allergic reactions progressed to anaphylaxis. It also means we have now started down the road of dealing with the problems my poor bubbas have been having.

* Trusting myself and my parenting. There are a fee reasons why I began to doubt myself and my ability to parent Niamh for her best outcomes. The reasons are not important. What is important is that somebody close to me gave me a mental shaking and helped me get my parenting mojo back. It’s amazing how quickly things I improved between Niamh and I once I started parenting my way and from a knowledge of who she is and what she needed.

* Kinder is amazing for many reasons. The socialisation for Niamh with different children, the learning she has been so enthusiastic to partake in, the sharing of new things when she gets home, the positive experiences she is having outside of home. They are all setting her in good stead for a positive start to her primary schooling next year. And don’t judge me but sometimes that break when Niamh is at Kinder is exactly what need too.

* My mum has been dropping in at least once a week just to check in and make sure I am doing OK. It’s nice to know someone is looking out for me. Even more important is that there have been a couple of times this past month when I have had to call her for assistance and she has come straight over. Help with Niamh when Paris was killed, to look after the kids while I went to the chemist so I didn’t need to take them out in the rain, and most recently to stay with the girls so Hubby could come for a late night dash to the hospital with Declan.

* Sisterly love. I may not see my sister as much as I would like but I know she truly loves me and my children. She even likes my hubby lol. When we do get to see each other it’s so nice. The chats, the relaxing, the understanding. Now if only our kids would be nicer to each other and act like friends instead of siblings.

* My besties. I am lucky to have a couple of really close friends who support me so very much. One in particular has lately become my life saver, knowing exactly what I need and when. Sometimes I think she has ESP!! I’m brewing up a post about her that you should see in the near future.

* Actually on the topic of friends, I am lucky to have some amazing friends who understand what I am going through even if they haven’t experienced it themselves.

* Currently I am having a love affair with boots. So much so that I have gone a little crazy in my acquiring of said boots. In the space of two weeks I bought a pair of black knee highs, a pair of black rouched calf boots, and two pairs of true ankle boots (black and camel) because they were so damn comfy.

* After my shopping spree, both online and out in the real world, I have begun to feel good in the clothes I wear. This is a very new thing for me. It’s actually rare that I feel happy with what I wear or how I look. But after some thinking about what I really like, how I want to look, what makes me uncomfortable and what works on my body, I have started to build a wardrobe of things I love.

* Since changing formulas and having the twins diagnosed with cows milk allergy things are slowly improving. They are no longer congested, there have been no face seeking or throat hoarsening incidents, no more diarrhoea and nappies that no longer smell as if they are filled with road kill.

* Love and hugs from Niamh. Although we have our ups and downs there is nothing that beats the random “I love you mummy’s” and hugs and kisses that I get blessed with on a regular basis. Heart melting stuff.

* Getting brave and considering the future is something that is slowly occurring. Lately I have felt as if our family needs a big change. I’m not sure what this change will be but I am opening myself up to embracing it when it appears in our lives and not running from it in fear. Whatever it is I know something is coming and I am feeling more prepared for it each day.

* I am blessed to have a hubby who makes sure I take time out for me. A shopping trip, a couple of hours at the hairdressers, a massage, a chance to sneak out for a cuppa with a girlfriend, time to sleep. All of these things recharge my batteries and allow me to be a better version of myself.

* I think I may have mentioned this before, but I hate cooking. It’s just not something I enjoy am or very talented at. My repertoire includes things that are quick and easy to cook and prepare, which is probably a very good thing now the twins are here. So imagine my delight in myself and my cooking prowess when I created delicious pizza scrolls in the slow cooker!!

* Kids birthday parties. Seriously they are just so much fun for everyone. The kids have a ball, parenting is stress free (unless tears result, which occurs more often than you think) and the adults get a chance to catch up and gossip. Did I mention birthday cake? And even better, when you leave, lolly bags! Win win all around.

* Time alone with Niamh. We’ve had birthday parties and a visit with my bestie that included all of us having a “coffee tea”. Poor Niamh has the concept right, we just must say cuppa tea too fast for her dear little ears lol. Or perhaps it’s because you ask “do you want a coffee or tea”. Either way I love my “coffee teas” with my boofa.

* Cheeky, cheeky bubba smiles from Harper just melt my heart and make me laugh out loud no matter how inappropriate that laughter may be. She just has a way of grinning at you all open mouthed and gummy, her head turned and slightly tilted to the side, and usually gripping her hands reminiscent of Mr Burns. It’s really hard not to respond at 4am when she should be hurrying up with her bottle and going straight back to bed.

* Declan’s giggles are one of the best sounds on Earth. Even though my little man goes through so much pain on any given day, he can find something to giggle about and melt my heart. He loves his kisses and will chuckle when I bounce him and kiss his face all over. Such a beautiful little boy.

* And I left the best for last. For the last week the twins have slept through the night. As in, they have gone down between 8 and 8:30 at night, and not woken until 7am. It has been wonderful. Now if only I could sleep through the night instead of getting up to check on them, to see if their sounds are because they need me, and of course to pee. Hopefully this is a trend that will continue from now on!!

I’ve decided I would like to make an addition to my positivity files. Each week I am going to nominate something I am going to commit to doing to increase my positivity, feelings of happiness, or increase my general week being. Each week I will add to a list of things I am doing, not just to remind myself of all I accomplish but also to remember that positivity and happiness are things you work towards.

So today I begin my list I start with something simple. To increase my positivity and happiness I will:
1. Have a shower every day.

This sounds simple but its actually about making time for myself to enjoy a nice, hot, relaxing shower no matter how short the duration. A couple of minutes to myself to enjoy all that a shower has to offer.

What positive things have happened in your life lately? What do you do to increase your well being and feelings of happiness? Any suggestions of things I can eventually add to my list?

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